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Webcam Desktop Crit Journal
Fri, 2010-02-19 13:18 — christopher
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Syndicate
We really want to get a lot
We really want to get a lot of stuff solved in blocking. We want it to really be a really solid foundation. WE dont want it to be in a state of I can see all sorts of stuff wrong with it. Its like building the foundations of a house. Its really important we dont have those extra notes. Now we are moving out of blocking there is a lot of stuff which needs to be solved.
First of all move the frame a little higher because there is this negative space on top of here. We could chop of a bit of the side screen.
At the beginning of the shot we need to know what is haening for that second and a half.
Right now he is standing in this pose which does not really tell us anything about the character.
The hips are squared off and the shoulders and the legs are standing there.
It doesnt look like a comfortable natural pose and it doesnt really tell us anything about what he is doing.
Then when he leans forward he should be extended out over this foot closest to the conveyor belt.
Then the next pose I am not sure what is going on with the hands.
All the technical issues like rigging and constraints need to be solved in blocking as well.
Clearly here his hand is not on the box.
You need to get the hands in more of a relaxed pose and more engaged with what it is going to be doing.
The pose with the arms right up I am not sure what it is. Is it a constraint thing or what?
With both hands and both thumbs up they are kind of twinned both going up like that but they ae not engaged.
Its not a really strong pose. I am not sure if he is reaching out. He is probably going to reach down and then go up not go all the way up and reach down.
Again I would really encourage acting it out like if I pick up a box how do I do it? Really feel it. That will help you get the strongest result.
When he turns and then throws it first of all I do not think this hand would pop up right away.
pUt it down lower.
It feels like you should have more of a twist with the shoulders and the hips also facing more where you he is throwing it.
The hands drop down and he turns back and then this
front hand is very engaged like it is going to grab something and the back hand isnt and then it holds that pose for the rest of the shot and that again doesnt tell us what happens for the next considerable amount of frames for the last second.
So that needs to be solved as well.
Concentrate on getting the blocking solved before moving forward because without the blocking there its going to be tought the whole way through.
Its looking a lot better
I think overall it is feeling a lot better and you had to work through some things during the course of this shot to get it to play out the way you wanted it to but I think its looking really nice. So I think overall. It sounds like you had run out of time and there are a couple of things you are working on but I think you did a really nice job on it and I think the next thing would be to continue going through it and refining it. A couple of points going forward to help benefit your shot. We really want to get that sense of power like the legs have pushed the hips off, so right in the frame where he is pushing off the leg shape needs to change. I see that same leg shape where what I would expect is to have the leg pushing down here.
The hands are locked in position also at one point.
The thumbs need to be more relaxed also.
What it needs
Its looking a lot smoother, but there are some timing issues and it needs some more anticipations before the bounding moves. The bouncing ball compresses and how it speeds out. Focus on certain things to maximise the success of this shot. First the timing and then the anticipation and then some more things after that. I want to give you a focused list.
Timing and anticipation are hand in hand and they are both going to change how the actions feel. When the character does this anticipation at the beginning you need to hold it for about two frames more so that it reads a little longer before it takes off.
When he starts to take off his feet should still be on the ground and he should be pushing himself off with his feet. Right now he looks like he is just hovering because we do not feel that contact as he is pushing off into the air as he starts to jump.
When he hits with his hands on the somersault for the first time there is a bit of compression but we need a bit more. Get his head as low as we can go without actually going into the ground and if his arms can bend too that will really help too. We just really need to feel that compression down before taking off again.
When he comes out of the hand jump and back upright on to his feet also it needs two more frames. I odnt mean freeze it. Have that key pose with a little motion going through the pose but that key pose is visible because its just important to feel that anticipation on that one.
On the second jump out of the somersault put a couple more frames in.
We need more anticipation before the jumps.
On the take-off for the cartwheel the foot seems like a bit slow. It probably just two frames but maybe if you actually keep the legs down, then at the top of the arc get the legs up a little bit higher perhaps it would feel a little bit more dynamic and his legs are moving a little faster. That might help too.
On the hands when he hits the ground it feels like the body should be moving forward when the second hand hits the ground so that needs adjustment too.
When he hits with the arms get that elbow compression and have a couple of frames of that before jumping off again.
At the end when he is landing put a couple of frames between 82 and 83.
On the two somersaults on the hands they are too slow and they need to lose a couple of frames on each.
On the two hops they are too quick and so you need to lose a couple of frames in there.
Then on the last jump you need to put in a couple of frames at the end.
So some timing adjustments and some anticipation is needed.
On the first jump remember when a character leaves the ground their hips lead while their feet are still on the ground. Your legs are powered and they push your hips. Your hips are moving first and then your feet are going to follow behind. We really need to feel like that on the jumps.
You also need to make some adjustments to the poses. On frame 41 to 45, just sticking out to the side does not feel natural. It needs to be more flexed, same thing happens later. Its most hips and feet you need to solve but if you can do a pass on the hands that would be great. I would recommend though focusing on getting the timing and anticpation right and making it really solid in terms of timing. Then maybe do a pass on that arm that is sticking out a little bit or on both hands if you can.
The winding up with the arms
The winding up with the arms does not read well. When we introduce new ideas the planning is not there. He should probably be looking up before he jumps.
There is still a lot of jittery keys. It really needs to be simplified with those curves. More fluid and more smooth and more work. The swining at the end there are timing issues. It goes back and forth too many times, goes fast and then suddenly stops. It sounds like you learned a lot about the process. It still needs a lot of work on it.
The hands
We want to make sure the hands are smooth because we dont want to feel there is crazy noise going on. Really get the hips and spine down really smooth and then you can work on the hands. The thing that makes it a little bit easier is that the arms are almost like secondary things. It gives a little bit more leeway to get the arms smooth.